Hell Hath No Fury Like a Woman’s Hormones

I think mine are in full-on rage.  Or, completely gone.  Or, I contracted malaria in the jungles of my farm.

Trying to change one’s eating habits at this age is no picnic.  But, looking back at my food journals, I’m doing pretty well overall.

Exercise, not so much.  What is complicating matters as far as exercise goes is the fatigue that has settled in my body over the past week.  That, and symptoms that I’m just about to have a visit from cousin Mary.   Or whatever it is that happens when we are too old to put up with Mary, but, in God’s Infinite Wisdom, He decides that instead of just ending menstruation, period, we need a gentle, gradual withdrawal phase to ease the transition.  As if stopping cold-turkey the sore boobs, bloating, melancholy and feminine hygiene products will be too traumatic for us to endure.  Which is odd for God to decide that, given that in that same gentle weaning phase, He throws in some fresh new traumas like hot flashes and night sweats.

In a word, menopause.  The pause between men-strual cycles  and o-thank God that’s finally over.

As hypochondriacal as I am not, the fatigue has been sufficiently life-impacting that I was thinking flu?   hypothyroidism?  mono?  spinal meningitis?   I Google “menopause fatigue” — And I discover that there is something called “crash fatigue” as a symptom of menopause.  That is what it feels like, a total crash-and-burn.  No survivor.

Since I have already decided that I’m not going to do hormone-replacement therapy, I next Google “menopause fatigue treatment.”    I get “get more and better sleep” as the Number One treatment.   Oh, please.  Tell that to Lulu the Hurricane in a Dog Package who adopted my bed quicker than she adopted the freshly baked whole turkey breast  left on the counter by the stupid Human Treat Dispenser.

Lulu is the black thing guarding the pillows

But with help from Google’s Infinite Wisdom, I find some supplements, estrogen replacement via plants or something,  not an illegal weight-loss drug per the Commandments.   I’ll try it.  I’ll try anything to get back the Human part of the Treat Dispenser.  Not that Lulu will care.  She has the bed.  And a cat.

4 responses to “Hell Hath No Fury Like a Woman’s Hormones

  1. I have been looking at the nutritional side of things myself. Soy in any form is supposed to be beneficial- I am no big tofu eater, but I like edamame pretty well as a snack by itself or mixed with other veggies. I’ve also switched to soy milk in my coffee. I don’t know if it helped, or if it’s coincidental, but I am feeling better.

    Many of the dietary tweaks for menopausal issues are also advised as anti-inflammatory, which is a double plus for me, since I decided to have “elevated rheumatoid levels” this summer, on top of everything else.

    and as for the “more and better sleep” duh! If we didn’t have the symptoms, we’d have “more and better sleep!”

  2. i was going to google “elevated rheumatoid levels” but i thought better of it. decided it was bad luck. you know, like to google someone else’s maladies reveals a secret envy that someone might think is a wish and then grant it. no thank you. i have plenty.

  3. Hi, I’m really enjoying this! But note that a lot of soy is NOT good for older women, I belive it can complicate hormonal issues and perhaps have more serious effects.

  4. Funny….now that I’ve lost fifty (50!) POUNDS (as of this morning…yooo hoo!!!!) I don’t have a lot of those hormonal problems any more. And, remember that awful cough I used to have? So hard that I’d often puke in the mornings? Gone, miraculously, after years and years of doctoring. All it took was getting off the sugar overload that used to be my daily life. I feel fabulous these days. You’re on your way. It’s absolutely, positively, incredibly worth the often difficult and frustrating journey. You go, girl!

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